5 Tips for How to Give Birth Naturally Without Pain

5 Tips for How to Give Birth Naturally Without Pain

Want to know how to give birth naturally without pain? Awesome! It IS possible to greatly reduce discomfort during birth. These are the five best ways.

Before we dive into specific natural childbirth techniques for relaxation and feeling more comfortable in birth, let’s talk about your mindset.

Birth is beautiful and life-changing, but it is just as challenging, and it can also be downright scary. One of the keys to successful natural childbirth without much pain is to have confidence in yourself, your body, and the team you have chosen to support you in your birth. The more comfortable and confident you can be in these things, the more likely you will be able to find the physical and mental space needed to use these natural childbirth relaxation techniques.

And while I don’t think we should dwell on the pain or the fear of childbirth, it is also something that perhaps we should look at head on.

Instead of ignoring it, let any emotions that come with the idea of pain or childbirth bubble up to the surface so you can look at them and release them long before your birthing time comes. Most times when we lock our fears away instead of facing them, they just becoming scarier.

It’s also important to keep in mind that part of the reason a lot of women experience severe discomfort and pain in childbirth is their resistance to the process.

We’ve been conditioned by movies and pop culture depictions of birth to expect screaming and extreme pain. If I’m being honest, it isn’t exactly an easy process, but through having the right techniques you can learn to relax into the process which also makes it more comfortable. The more you resist and tighten your body up, the more painful it is.

(Not to be too explicit but…) Think about pooping or throwing up. If you strain and try to control the process too much, it isn’t very comfortable. But if you just let your body do its thing, it isn’t so bad and you usually feel so much better after.

Another point to keep in mind is not all of these techniques will work for everyone, and there is no way to know what will feel good to you until you are actually in your birthing time. Perhaps take a few notes and prep for as many eventualities as possible so you can have access to all that you need for an awesome birth.

(Side note: I am a mom of three, and am also currently in training to be a doula. These recommendations are based on a mix of personal experience and research. I also recommend some products that I am an affiliate for, which means I get a small commission at no extra cost to you if you purchase through my link. Of course, you should always check with your doctor or midwife.)

Water.

Even when you aren’t pushing a tiny human out of your vagina, water is so relaxing. There’s a reason us moms love to include bubble baths on our lists of self-care practice musts-do’s.

There’s something soothing, not just physically, but also emotionally to being submerged in some comfy warm water. It’s like we ourselves are back inside the womb and in a safe space.

This doesn’t necessarily mean a tub though. Not all birthing spaces have tubs available. Warm washcloths or compresses on the lower back and even warm showers can be just as comforting and relaxing as a full on bath. (And don’t forget to drink water as needed to stay hydrated too!)

Hypnosis and/or meditation.

Our mind is incredibly powerful. If we are able to relax our mind, our body will follow.

I have personally used Hypnobabies to relax and be pretty comfortable and at ease for most of the duration of my births. I even credit Hypnobabies with helping me to have an epidural-free twin birth in a hospital, no small feat!

I can’t say that I had absolutely no pain, but the techniques I learned and the hypnosis tracks I was able to listen to kept me relaxed enough to go with the flow and manage what my body was going through with a fair amount of ease, considering the circumstances.

A mantra.

“When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me…” That first line of Let it Be from the Beatles replayed over and over and over again in my mind while I was at about 8-9cm with my twins.

During every contraction, it would float through my brain as a kind of mantra. I felt the presence of other moms who had given birth before me and were even giving birth at that moment.

I didn’t plan on this, it just came to me in the moment, but I think having a mantra or something to focus on can be incredibly helpful! Many mamas even print out banners or photos with quotes or mantras on to focus on during contractions.

Massage and pressure.

Having some hands-on help is amazing for both physical and emotional comfort. Some women may not want to be touched at all while birthing, but for me having some massage and strong pressure on my lower back was a lifesaver.

I had a lot of intensity in my back during both of my births, and the pressure from my mom, husband, and doulas during both births helped alleviate some of the pressure.

A team for emotional support.

The most intense part of birth for many women is during transition just before they are ready to start pushing that little squishy baby out. It was in this period that I felt like maybe I couldn’t do it. Maybe it was just too hard for me.

A little thought in the back of my mind reminded me that in almost every birth story I read, the point at which you feel like you can’t do it anymore is the point at which you are almost there! But I also told my doula that I was feeling not so confident, and I was able to cry and just let it all out to her. Once I did, it eased my tension.

Don’t underestimate the value of a good cry. This is an emotional process and no one expects you to be robot! Remember, the key is to stay relaxed, and a big release of emotion can be super helpful, even necessary for how to give birth naturally without pain.

In addition to these five tips, you also want to set yourself up for success. This means researching more options, watching natural birth videos for inspiration, getting that birth plan done, and consider hiring a doula! (maybe even a postpartum doula too so you can rest easy knowing you’ll have some help)

The key to how to give birth naturally without pain though is to first and foremost believe in yourself and your body. If you are able to embrace the process and trust, then you are in the best place possible to give birth naturally without pain.

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It’s so easy to get buried in stuff when you’re a parent. Kids have so many things! Combine that with yours and a partner’s? The clutter can easily get out of control. That’s why today we are going to talk about clearing clutter, where to start.

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Where are the energy blocks?

The first thing she recommends starting with is identifying what is draining your energy. Make a list of the energy blocks in your house. Where are the places or items that when you go to use them, totally derail you?

And we’re not just talking about physical space that clutter can take up. Don’t forget about emotional items that might be tripping you up, like old letters or cards from an ex that send you into a tailspin.

Do you really need to hold on to all those keepsakes that don’t make you feel all warm and fuzzy? Maybe it’s time to let go.

For those gems you find, like childhood poetry or a list of your favorite things when you were 6, consider digitizing instead of keeping paper copies. Can you take a photo or scan it into the computer? Then you’ll be able to hang on to the memories without the clutter.

Do Your Own Thing

This is an individualized process. The focus here is to determine what is going to work for you. Which items are just taking up space, both physically and emotionally, and which items still have value for you?

Forget target numbers of possessions or sticking to whatever trendy methods are out there.

The point of de-cluttering is to add to your well-being, to make you happy, and create less stress in your life. So don’t feel pressure to adhere to someone else’s system that might not be the best for you.

But what if the clutter isn’t even yours?

Dealing with someone elses’s clutter. Kids, spouses, parents, in-laws, outlaws… sometimes it’s not even YOUR clutter that you need to sort through.

How do you deal with other people creating clutter in your space? It can be super awkward when people like grandparents are just trying to spoil their grandkids by showering them with all the things, meanwhile you’ve been donating toys at an epic rate.

Mia’s first suggesting is to start by having a conversation. Talk through your goals with others. Perhaps talk to that overgiving grandparent about gifting your child with experiences, or come to some kind of understanding about what your child would most benefit from.

Then when it comes to clearing out those overcrowded toyboxes, Mia says she has a rule that her kids can keep anything that fits inside of their toybox (and the lid closes).

Anything else must go, but the child is allowed to choose what to keep and what to let go of. Toys can get excessive so quickly, and kids really only play with a small percentage of their toys.

If toy clutter is a killer for you, establish some clear guidelines with your child(ren) on what will work for your home and what won’t, then stick to it.

Mia and I chat about all of this and much more in this episode of the MomUp Show. Listen here for more how clearing clutter where to start.

Mia Danielle is a mom of two who helps busy moms create home spaces that support them, their energy, and their purpose.

You can find more about Mia:

On her blog:  miadanielle.com

Facebook:  www.facebook.com/miadanielleblog

Instagram:  www.instagram.com/_mia_danielle.

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Being “Just a Mom” and Why I Want to Be a Stay at Home Mom.

Being “Just a Mom” and Why I Want to Be a Stay at Home Mom.

Being called "just" a mom is offensive as hell. Any mother knows that this is the toughest job in the world. I've worked outside of the home, from home, and have also not worked while staying home with kids. I would always been quick to call out someone who puts down...

How Shame Stops Moms from Practicing Self-Care

How Shame Stops Moms from Practicing Self-Care

How many times have you heard that self-care is essential as a mom? That we have to fill our own cup first, or put on our own oxygen mask before helping others? But the thing is... how often do you actually practice self-care?   We chalk it up to not having the...

First Trimester Must Haves for Morning Sickness

First Trimester Must Haves for Morning Sickness

These first trimester must haves are absolutely essential for all the mamas out there struggling. This is a list of all the pregnancy essentials for first trimester morning sickness is no joke.   Getting over that (all day) morning sickness... As I type this out,...

Myths About Stay-At-Home-Mom Entrepreneurs

Myths About Stay-At-Home-Mom Entrepreneurs

As a stay-at-home-mom entrepreneur I feel like there are a few myths floating around out there about what we do. So let’s put on our hardhats and bust some myths about stay-at-home-mom entrepreneurs.

Two Shirt Method: How to Discreetly Breastfeed in Public

Two Shirt Method: How to Discreetly Breastfeed in Public

Learning to breastfeed as a new mom can be challenging, and when it comes to breastfeeding in public, things can get awkward pretty quickly when you aren’t very experienced at it. But there is a super simple trick to low-key nursing in public, it’s called the two shirt method.

I remember one of the first times I ever breastfed in public

It was at an NHL hockey game (go Flyers) while my father-in-law sat next to me about 2 inches away. To say it was a little uncomfortable would be an understatement.

There I was trying to be discreet with my newborn wrapped in a Moby wrap while she’s screaming her head off from hunger. My poor father-in-law was asking “can I help?” The poor guy didn’t know what the hell to do, and I’m not sure there was anything he could really do that wouldn’t have been awkward.

Did I mention I had these earmuffs on her head to protect her little ears from the noise, which inevitably fell off as soon as she got latched.

It was a mess!

Thankfully, after quite a few attempts I was able to find a comfortable position and she got her fill before passing out.

Since that first nearly failed attempt at breastfeeding in public, I’ve learned a thing or two. I’ve even mastered the art of tandem nursing my twins while in public! (My first try at that was a disaster too.)

The simplest and easiest way I’ve found to breastfeed in public without having to feel super exposed is the two shirt method.

Before I dive in, let me be really clear though…

If you want to just whip out a boob or two and go to town nursing without worrying about being discreet, PLEASE DO! The ONLY reason to be discreet is for your own comfort. Do what feels best for you and your baby, not anyone else.

That said, if you like to keep things on the down-low, the best method for discreetly breastfeeding in public is the two shirt method.

I even use this to tandem feed my twins.

All you do is wear a tank top (usually a nursing tank) under another shirt. So when you need to nurse you just pull up the top shirt, down the bottom, and latch baby on.

The only thing exposed is the area covered by your baby. Super discreet. Check out this picture.

That’s it! The two shirt method, the easiest way to breastfeed in public discreetly. No need for covers, receiving blankets, or any other weird products I see floating around the interwebs. Just you, strategic clothing and your baby.

(PS – Check out our roundup of all the best nursing bras here!)

Self-Care Ideas for Moms (From a Dad and Teacher)

Self-Care Ideas for Moms (From a Dad and Teacher)

These self-care ideas for moms are must-know if you are one of those people who craves alone time and doesn't know what to do with it when you get it! Ironically, it's a dad who is going to share some of these essential self-care strategies with us today. Taking care...

Why Breastfeeding is Important Beyond Health

Why Breastfeeding is Important Beyond Health

We could talk about the health benefits for mom and baby which most people point to, but there are other reasons to consider why breastfeeding is important. Breastfeeding is a complicated topic in mom culture today. While we are in a sort of renaissance when it comes...

Teaching Kids to Cook, Getting Started

Teaching Kids to Cook, Getting Started

Teaching kids to cook has a ton of benefits for parents and kids. While it may seem daunting to let your little ones take on the responsibility of helping prepare meals, it is totally doable. Most parents make sure that the entire kitchen is baby-proofed and safe for...

Mom Hack: Knowing Baby Developmental Leaps

Mom Hack: Knowing Baby Developmental Leaps

Dealing with cranky kids is rough, but if you want to take those extra fussy baby days in stride then knowing baby developmental leaps is essential! We've all been there. Our sweet little squish is the most calm and cool kid ever... until they're not. You wake up one...

5 Tips for How to Give Birth Naturally Without Pain

5 Tips for How to Give Birth Naturally Without Pain

Want to know how to give birth naturally without pain? Awesome! It IS possible to greatly reduce discomfort during birth. These are the five best ways. Before we dive into specific natural childbirth techniques for relaxation and feeling more comfortable in birth,...

Clearing Clutter Where to Start

Clearing Clutter Where to Start

It's so easy to get buried in stuff when you're a parent. Kids have so many things! Combine that with yours and a partner's? The clutter can easily get out of control. That's why today we are going to talk about clearing clutter, where to start. Mia Danielle joins me...

Two Shirt Method: How to Discreetly Breastfeed in Public

Two Shirt Method: How to Discreetly Breastfeed in Public

Learning to breastfeed as a new mom can be challenging, and when it comes to breastfeeding in public, things can get awkward pretty quickly when you aren’t very experienced at it. But there is a super simple trick to low-key nursing in public, it’s called the two shirt method.

Having a Motherhood Identity Crisis?

Having a Motherhood Identity Crisis?

Becoming a mother for the first (or second, third, fourth, five...) time is life-changing and beautiful, but it can also lead to a motherhood identity crisis. People say your life is over when you have children. I tried to deny it. I tried to fight it. I tried to...

Nourishing Your Body (Simple Self-Care Part 3)

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Learning to Love Your Body as a Mom

Learning to Love Your Body as a Mom

Who else struggles with learning to love your body? I know I’m not the only one, right? As we try to change the way we view moms and postpartum bodies, so many times we are still just learning to love our bodies ourselves.

How to Stop Yelling at Your Kids with One Simple Tip

How to Stop Yelling at Your Kids with One Simple Tip

We've all been there, right? There are few people who can push our buttons like those little cherubs known as... our kids. But we also know that keeping our cool is key to being the parent we want to be. Try this one simple tip on how to stop yelling at your kids....

Being a Mother is the Best Feeling. What Could Compare?

Being a Mother is the Best Feeling. What Could Compare?

It's easy to get caught up in the chaos of motherhood, but being a mother is the best feeling. This whirlwind of diapers, sticky hands, bath times, bedtimes, routines, schedules that are thrown out the window, baby pools, and more is exquisite even if it's so hard. I...

Skin Care Products for Breastfeeding Moms

Skin Care Products for Breastfeeding Moms

Which skin care products for breastfeeding moms are best? Which ingredients should you avoid, and what is considered safe? This will get you started in your research into which skin care products to use while breastfeeding.

How to Be a Better Parent with Personal Development

How to Be a Better Parent with Personal Development

How many time have you agonized over losing it and yelling at your kids, or felt guilty over all the screen time they are getting lately? It's normal if you tend to wonder how you can be a better parent. This is a tough job. Karen Hewitt shares in this episode of...

Forgiving Yourself for Parenting Mistakes

Forgiving Yourself for Parenting Mistakes

We’ve all thought it at least one, right? The question: “Am I screwing up my kids?” The truth is… yes. To some extent. We all are. Because we can’t do this job perfectly and it’s time we learn that forgiving yourself for parenting mistakes is not just ok, but essential.

Weight Loss for Busy Moms: How to Start Your Healthy Journey

Weight Loss for Busy Moms: How to Start Your Healthy Journey

Moms are under so much pressure to not just be the best mother possible, but to look like society's idea of perfection while doing it. It can be really hard to both love ourselves exactly as we are while also wanting to be healthy and happy. Jai Murphy, certified...

How to Enjoy Being a Stay-at-Home Mom

How to Enjoy Being a Stay-at-Home Mom

For a lot of moms (and dads), being able to stay at home with the kids and ditch the 9-5 sounds like a fantasy. But once you’re actually at home with those kids 24/7, it can get a little monotonous (and chaotic) to say the least. It can be hard to actually enjoy it. So here are our 10 best tips on how to enjoy being a stay-at-home mom.

25 Inspirational Mom Quotes

25 Inspirational Mom Quotes

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What Do Moms Want for Mother’s Day? (This Mom Shares the Truth)

What Do Moms Want for Mother’s Day? (This Mom Shares the Truth)

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Are Royal Births Different Than Ours?

Are Royal Births Different Than Ours?

Have you seen this meme? It's a glowing Meghan Markle with Prince Harry and the newest royal baby, Archie on one side. On the other side, is a typical family at the hospital after a birth, with mom rockin' some of our fav mesh panties.   There is no doubt that...

Giving Birth without an Epidural

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Why Do We Celebrate Mother’s Day? Is It Time We Stopped?

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Single Mommin’ It and Providing for Your Family

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Life Was Boring Before Kids

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Moms Who Drink: Is Drinking Out of Control for Moms?

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The Truth About How Hard it is to Be a Mom

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Re-building the Village: Creating Community for Moms

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there might be a ton of reasons we sometimes feel divided as moms, but the truth is that any division that happens within the mom community are truly due to our lack of connection. While we may be a group that shares many things in common, we don't always feel like a...

They Grow Up So Fast: Learning to Go With the Flow in Motherhood

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Rainbow Toys for Toddlers

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Natural Breech Birth: Making Confident Choices in Childbirth

Natural Breech Birth: Making Confident Choices in Childbirth

Making choices in childbirth can be a nerve-wracking experience for many first-time moms, but that's the beauty of having a birth plan (especially when you end up with an unplanned natural breech birth).   Lisa Chin learned first hand the benefits of having a...

Dealing With a Picky Eater: Does Your Child Refuse to Eat Anything?

Dealing With a Picky Eater: Does Your Child Refuse to Eat Anything?

guest post by Melody Manwell. It's not just you mama. I know it feels like maybe you're failing when your kid eats about 3 items, none are healthy, and dealing with a picky eater is so hard! That's why Melody Manwell is here to shed some light on why your kid might be...

Easy Meals for New Moms

Easy Meals for New Moms

Meal planning can overwhelm anyone. Add a newborn into the mix and it can be downright impossible! But if you’re due any day now or just had a bundle of joy, read on for tips and tricks to survive the first three months with a newborn. These easy meals for new moms...

MomUp Episode 6 with Sammi Blaque

MomUp Episode 6 with Sammi Blaque

Being present, getting grounded, centered, self-love, self-care... this doesn't have to mean hours and hours of time we set aside away from our kids. We can do it in the moment and reconnect with who we are as moms through our body and through sensuality. Sammi...

3 Keys to a Strong Marriage After Having a Baby

3 Keys to a Strong Marriage After Having a Baby

by contributor: April Vaassen Just surviving can be tough, let alone thriving and making sure your marriage is staying strong after having a baby. But, mama, it IS possible. These three keys have helped me maintain a strong marriage after having a baby.   I often...

MomUp Show Episode 5 with Christina Johnson

MomUp Show Episode 5 with Christina Johnson

As a mom, sometimes it's hard to just accomplish taking a shower. But we have to much potential we can tap into. So many goals we can achieve, and dreams to reach.  In this episode of the MomUp Show, I chat with Christina Johnson all about living your purpose and how...

MomUp Show Episode 4 with Ashley Hagan

MomUp Show Episode 4 with Ashley Hagan

Hey Mamas. Morgan here. You know, I rarely actually introduce MYSELF on episodes. But I'm the founder of momuprising.com and this podcast. I love hanging out with you every week, and I am so excited to present this episode. Ashley Hagan is a yoga instructor and brand...

MomUp Show Episode 3 with Aleia McDaniel

MomUp Show Episode 3 with Aleia McDaniel

Self-care for moms is about more than bubble baths and brunches. It runs much deeper, and is a learned skill. One essential component is creating boundaries around self-care for moms.  Aleia McDaniel shares how she was able to create fierce boundaries for her...

Episode 2 with Sunshine Boatright

Episode 2 with Sunshine Boatright

Moms. Give yourself some grace. We put the weight of the world on our shoulders, and our ambition is high octane sometimes, but we also need to show ourselves a minimum level of self-love and self-care.  Sunshine Boatright joins us on the second episode of the...

I’m a Mom, and I Don’t Do Dishes.

I’m a Mom, and I Don’t Do Dishes.

I. Don't. Do. Dishes. This isn't an exaggeration either. Even though I'm a mom, and my primary job is caring for my children, I have done the dishes less than a handful of times in the last year.    Yeah that might seem impossible... but it's true. I don't do...

The Best Nursing Bras According to Breastfeeding Moms

The Best Nursing Bras According to Breastfeeding Moms

If there is one thing that changes after having a baby... it's your breasts. Chances are you don't quite recognize them anymore. Breastfeeding initially means your breasts are a lot bigger than they used to be and probably leaking milk on a regular basis. Once your...

What Self-Care Really Means for Moms? Being Your OWN Mom.

What Self-Care Really Means for Moms? Being Your OWN Mom.

Self-care as a mom is almost a joke at this point. It seems like some luxury we will never be rich enough to afford either with enough money or time. We feel like we are always running on a deficit of either income or sleep. But self-care isn't about the mani/pedi's...

Episode 1 with Dana Skoglund

Episode 1 with Dana Skoglund

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3 Reasons It’s Harder for Moms to Keep Resolutions

3 Reasons It’s Harder for Moms to Keep Resolutions

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Welcome to the MomUp Show

Welcome to the MomUp Show

Hey Mama, Nice to meet you. I'm Morgan, the founder of Mom Uprising. I'm here to help you reconnect, to find yourself again, even in the midst of the chaos of motherhood. As I type this, my 4 year old is sitting on my lap because she "wanted up." I know it's easy to...

Why I Ignored “Experts” to Embrace My Mama Bear Instincts

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Being Present Vs. Giving Presents this Holiday Season

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Delete. Delete. Delete... I hit that button about a dozen times until my Amazon cart was empty. I had gone on a bit of an adding to cart binge while looking for stocking stuffers for my kids. What I had intended to be a minimalist Christmas filled with experiences...

Why You Need a Postpartum Doula

Why You Need a Postpartum Doula

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What if You Don’t Have a College Fund for Your Kid?

What if You Don’t Have a College Fund for Your Kid?

Raise your hand if you haven't saved a dime toward your child's education. Feeling some guilt about that? The experts say don't! The idea of being able start saving for college may seem like a pipe dream. Yes, if you have some extra cash you can put away for your...

How I Feel About My Postpartum Body Now

How I Feel About My Postpartum Body Now

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5 Productivity Tips for Stay at Home Mom Entrepreneurs

5 Productivity Tips for Stay at Home Mom Entrepreneurs

It's no surprise that the number one issue for a stay at home mom entrepreneur is time and productivity. The average mom only gets 17 minutes of alone time per day. That's barely enough time to take a shower let alone build a business. Let's see if we can find a...

The Best Tips to Succeed at Breastfeeding from Real Moms

The Best Tips to Succeed at Breastfeeding from Real Moms

Breastfeeding is hard. Yes it's natural, but it doesn't always come naturally to many of us. Bad latch, low supply, going back to work, pressure to supplement from doctors... the list of possible issues that can arise is long and can be complicated. A few...

I’m Not Ready to Be a Soccer Mom. Where Did My Baby Go?

I’m Not Ready to Be a Soccer Mom. Where Did My Baby Go?

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This Real Mom Says Attachment Parenting is for Lazy Parents

This Real Mom Says Attachment Parenting is for Lazy Parents

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Owning My Story of Postpartum Depression

Owning My Story of Postpartum Depression

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Moms: Have You Forgotten Who You Were?

Moms: Have You Forgotten Who You Were?

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5 Tips for Work Life Balance for Moms

5 Tips for Work Life Balance for Moms

As a mom, it's easy to loose sight of what balance even means anymore. So often our needs are put on the back burner for bosses or babies. But self-love and self-care expert, Eva Ponce, is sharing her best 5 tips for work life balance for moms. To be successful as...

Being “Just a Mom” and Why I Want to Be a Stay at Home Mom.

Being “Just a Mom” and Why I Want to Be a Stay at Home Mom.

Being called "just" a mom is offensive as hell. Any mother knows that this is the toughest job in the world. I've worked outside of the home, from home, and have also not worked while staying home with kids. I would always been quick to call out someone who puts down...

How Shame Stops Moms from Practicing Self-Care

How Shame Stops Moms from Practicing Self-Care

How many times have you heard that self-care is essential as a mom? That we have to fill our own cup first, or put on our own oxygen mask before helping others? But the thing is... how often do you actually practice self-care?   We chalk it up to not having the...

First Trimester Must Haves for Morning Sickness

First Trimester Must Haves for Morning Sickness

These first trimester must haves are absolutely essential for all the mamas out there struggling. This is a list of all the pregnancy essentials for first trimester morning sickness is no joke.   Getting over that (all day) morning sickness... As I type this out,...

Myths About Stay-At-Home-Mom Entrepreneurs

Myths About Stay-At-Home-Mom Entrepreneurs

As a stay-at-home-mom entrepreneur I feel like there are a few myths floating around out there about what we do. So let’s put on our hardhats and bust some myths about stay-at-home-mom entrepreneurs.

Having a Motherhood Identity Crisis?

Having a Motherhood Identity Crisis?

Becoming a mother for the first (or second, third, fourth, five…) time is life-changing and beautiful, but it can also lead to a motherhood identity crisis.

People say your life is over when you have children.

I tried to deny it. I tried to fight it. I tried to pretend like everything was mostly the same. That I was the same person with the same hopes and the same dreams.

But I wasn’t, and I’m happy about that.

Who wants to be the same person for their entire life? Is that what life is about? Stasis? Sameness? Surely not.

Just a quick look around the world and you will notice that the one thing that is constant is change. Seasons come and go. Friends (and family) come and go. Relationships come and go. Pets come and go. Stores come and go.

If you live in an area as I do, every fall the leaves turn the most beautiful shades of red, yellow, orange, and brown then fall off the trees whirling their way in the wind to the ground. We go through the barrenness of winter with the distractions of the holiday season but soon the cold sinks into your bones until you year for the freshness of spring and the heat of summer.

 

Change, good or bad, is a necessity. There isn’t even a choice in the matter for us mere mortals. The best we can do is adapt and go along for the ride.

The same is true for becoming a parent and learning to evolve into the person you are meant to be after that tiny human(s) comes into your life.

The story of motherhood is truly about learning to surrender to nature, and being able to ride the waves of life that come at you. Your identity cracks and crumbles then blows away like dust in the wind.

The new you remembers that girl inside of you. A piece of her is still there, but she’s a backup singer and not the lead vocalist anymore. There’s a new voice, a new soul, and a new person inside of the body that has also been permanently changed through carrying and birthing a child(ren).

You become someone who is different and in some ways less, but most ways, so much more. You grow and become stronger. A more developed and evolved human. Someone who is more secure in her skin, and knows her place in the world.

But there are growing pains.

There’s a period of time where you don’t know what is happening. It’s like transition during birth. You don’t know if you can even go on. Surely you can’t do it. It’s too much. Your grip on reality even seems to fade in and out. You’re in your own little world, but that world doesn’t look anything like it used to.

As your old self blows away in the wind, you try to grasp it. You reach for it, but it slips through your fingers. It’s disconcerting, to say the least.

You’re in this in-between space where your old identity is gone, but the new one is yet to emerge completely. You might have a small sense that something new is coming. A new you is forming but hasn’t fully taken shape yet. That’s the motherhood identity crisis.

And guess what? It doesn’t happen just once. It happens over and over again throughout your life. When you go from one child to more than one, and then with each little milestone your child has you have some small internal milestone that is almost unnoticeable. But as they grow, you grow.

 

The trick is to learn to not try to hold on. Yes, you grasp tightly to those little moments when you feel the joy exploding out of your heart as you hold their little bodies as they sleep, or when they say “mama” for the first time, or when the sound out their first word in a book. But holding onto this little moments is not the same as holding on to who you think you are.

Allowing ourselves to grow without holding too strongly to who we used to be is just as essential as how we allow our children to grow without being too overbearing.

So if you’re in the middle of a motherhood identity crisis, just hold one. It gets better. Then it gets worse. Then it gets better again. One day you will feel like you even if it’s a new you.

Self-Care Ideas for Moms (From a Dad and Teacher)

Self-Care Ideas for Moms (From a Dad and Teacher)

These self-care ideas for moms are must-know if you are one of those people who craves alone time and doesn't know what to do with it when you get it! Ironically, it's a dad who is going to share some of these essential self-care strategies with us today. Taking care...

Why Breastfeeding is Important Beyond Health

Why Breastfeeding is Important Beyond Health

We could talk about the health benefits for mom and baby which most people point to, but there are other reasons to consider why breastfeeding is important. Breastfeeding is a complicated topic in mom culture today. While we are in a sort of renaissance when it comes...

Teaching Kids to Cook, Getting Started

Teaching Kids to Cook, Getting Started

Teaching kids to cook has a ton of benefits for parents and kids. While it may seem daunting to let your little ones take on the responsibility of helping prepare meals, it is totally doable. Most parents make sure that the entire kitchen is baby-proofed and safe for...

Mom Hack: Knowing Baby Developmental Leaps

Mom Hack: Knowing Baby Developmental Leaps

Dealing with cranky kids is rough, but if you want to take those extra fussy baby days in stride then knowing baby developmental leaps is essential! We've all been there. Our sweet little squish is the most calm and cool kid ever... until they're not. You wake up one...

5 Tips for How to Give Birth Naturally Without Pain

5 Tips for How to Give Birth Naturally Without Pain

Want to know how to give birth naturally without pain? Awesome! It IS possible to greatly reduce discomfort during birth. These are the five best ways. Before we dive into specific natural childbirth techniques for relaxation and feeling more comfortable in birth,...

Clearing Clutter Where to Start

Clearing Clutter Where to Start

It's so easy to get buried in stuff when you're a parent. Kids have so many things! Combine that with yours and a partner's? The clutter can easily get out of control. That's why today we are going to talk about clearing clutter, where to start. Mia Danielle joins me...

Two Shirt Method: How to Discreetly Breastfeed in Public

Two Shirt Method: How to Discreetly Breastfeed in Public

Learning to breastfeed as a new mom can be challenging, and when it comes to breastfeeding in public, things can get awkward pretty quickly when you aren’t very experienced at it. But there is a super simple trick to low-key nursing in public, it’s called the two shirt method.

Having a Motherhood Identity Crisis?

Having a Motherhood Identity Crisis?

Becoming a mother for the first (or second, third, fourth, five...) time is life-changing and beautiful, but it can also lead to a motherhood identity crisis. People say your life is over when you have children. I tried to deny it. I tried to fight it. I tried to...

Nourishing Your Body (Simple Self-Care Part 3)

Nourishing Your Body (Simple Self-Care Part 3)

How often do we think about our body as either a baby-making factory or something that needs to snap back into pre-baby shape? We are either feeding our bodies to feed our growing babies, or trying to morph it into something it resembled before a human incubated...

Learning to Love Your Body as a Mom

Learning to Love Your Body as a Mom

Who else struggles with learning to love your body? I know I’m not the only one, right? As we try to change the way we view moms and postpartum bodies, so many times we are still just learning to love our bodies ourselves.

How to Stop Yelling at Your Kids with One Simple Tip

How to Stop Yelling at Your Kids with One Simple Tip

We've all been there, right? There are few people who can push our buttons like those little cherubs known as... our kids. But we also know that keeping our cool is key to being the parent we want to be. Try this one simple tip on how to stop yelling at your kids....

Being a Mother is the Best Feeling. What Could Compare?

Being a Mother is the Best Feeling. What Could Compare?

It's easy to get caught up in the chaos of motherhood, but being a mother is the best feeling. This whirlwind of diapers, sticky hands, bath times, bedtimes, routines, schedules that are thrown out the window, baby pools, and more is exquisite even if it's so hard. I...

Skin Care Products for Breastfeeding Moms

Skin Care Products for Breastfeeding Moms

Which skin care products for breastfeeding moms are best? Which ingredients should you avoid, and what is considered safe? This will get you started in your research into which skin care products to use while breastfeeding.

How to Be a Better Parent with Personal Development

How to Be a Better Parent with Personal Development

How many time have you agonized over losing it and yelling at your kids, or felt guilty over all the screen time they are getting lately? It's normal if you tend to wonder how you can be a better parent. This is a tough job. Karen Hewitt shares in this episode of...

Forgiving Yourself for Parenting Mistakes

Forgiving Yourself for Parenting Mistakes

We’ve all thought it at least one, right? The question: “Am I screwing up my kids?” The truth is… yes. To some extent. We all are. Because we can’t do this job perfectly and it’s time we learn that forgiving yourself for parenting mistakes is not just ok, but essential.

Weight Loss for Busy Moms: How to Start Your Healthy Journey

Weight Loss for Busy Moms: How to Start Your Healthy Journey

Moms are under so much pressure to not just be the best mother possible, but to look like society's idea of perfection while doing it. It can be really hard to both love ourselves exactly as we are while also wanting to be healthy and happy. Jai Murphy, certified...

How to Enjoy Being a Stay-at-Home Mom

How to Enjoy Being a Stay-at-Home Mom

For a lot of moms (and dads), being able to stay at home with the kids and ditch the 9-5 sounds like a fantasy. But once you’re actually at home with those kids 24/7, it can get a little monotonous (and chaotic) to say the least. It can be hard to actually enjoy it. So here are our 10 best tips on how to enjoy being a stay-at-home mom.

25 Inspirational Mom Quotes

25 Inspirational Mom Quotes

25 of the best inspirational mom quotes for motivation, inspiration and commiseration. Enjoy these inspiration quotes mamas.1.The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness. -Honore de Balzac 2. One of the greatest titles...

What Do Moms Want for Mother’s Day? (This Mom Shares the Truth)

What Do Moms Want for Mother’s Day? (This Mom Shares the Truth)

Been wondering... what do moms wants for Mother's Day? Some people are just sooo hard to buy for, and while this is just my personal opinion, I'm about to let you off the hook and clue you in on what moms want for Mother's Day.This might be shocking to some, so...

Are Royal Births Different Than Ours?

Are Royal Births Different Than Ours?

Have you seen this meme? It's a glowing Meghan Markle with Prince Harry and the newest royal baby, Archie on one side. On the other side, is a typical family at the hospital after a birth, with mom rockin' some of our fav mesh panties.   There is no doubt that...

Giving Birth without an Epidural

Giving Birth without an Epidural

If you're thinking about giving birth without an epidural, then you're in the right place. Some people might try to talk you out of planning for a natural childbirth, but with the proper mindset and plan, it is totally doable for most moms! (I gave birth without an...

Why Do We Celebrate Mother’s Day? Is It Time We Stopped?

Why Do We Celebrate Mother’s Day? Is It Time We Stopped?

Today, Mother's Day is a day of brunching, flowers, cards, and if we are lucky, a alone time. Or perhaps the saintly among us just get to hang out and relax with our children because we prefer that to gifts and parties. But do we ever stop and wonder, why do we...

Single Mommin’ It and Providing for Your Family

Single Mommin’ It and Providing for Your Family

The hilarious and super smart Liz Meli-Wischman (now Marciniak) joins the MomUp Show this week to share how she has reached one of the highest levels of Younique through integrity, authenticity, and humor.  Mamas in MLM's or direct sales, listen up for this one! Liz...

Life Was Boring Before Kids

Life Was Boring Before Kids

You ever finally get that precious alone time away from your kids and wonder... what the hell do I do now? As much as we need alone time for self-care, date night, or just to poop, so many times when we finally get it, we don't know what to do with it. And one thing...

Moms Who Drink: Is Drinking Out of Control for Moms?

Moms Who Drink: Is Drinking Out of Control for Moms?

There are viral posts both joking about how mommy needs alcohol to survive motherhood with these little dictators ruling our lives... Then there are posts all about how we shouldn't need alcohol to be a mom, and that the jokes about drinking and motherhood have...

The Truth About How Hard it is to Be a Mom

The Truth About How Hard it is to Be a Mom

You can't prepare for it, and you can't understand it until you are living it. But it is so hard to be a mom. Momlife is no joke. Physically, emotionally, spiritually it changes and challenges you. Let's talk about the truth about how hard it is to be a mom, and maybe...

Re-building the Village: Creating Community for Moms

Re-building the Village: Creating Community for Moms

there might be a ton of reasons we sometimes feel divided as moms, but the truth is that any division that happens within the mom community are truly due to our lack of connection. While we may be a group that shares many things in common, we don't always feel like a...

They Grow Up So Fast: Learning to Go With the Flow in Motherhood

They Grow Up So Fast: Learning to Go With the Flow in Motherhood

"They grow up so fast." You hear it over and over again from experienced moms, maybe your own mom, aunt, grandmother... and inevitably when you talk to a brand new mom, you say the same thing to her. The time goes so fast, they grow up so fast. You wish there was...

Rainbow Toys for Toddlers

Rainbow Toys for Toddlers

Looking for rainbow toys for toddlers, or even older kids, that will add some color to their space? These toys are cool enough that you won't need to hide them away in bins, and they don't blare kiddie tunes that get stuck in your head allllll day. These 10 rainbow...

Natural Breech Birth: Making Confident Choices in Childbirth

Natural Breech Birth: Making Confident Choices in Childbirth

Making choices in childbirth can be a nerve-wracking experience for many first-time moms, but that's the beauty of having a birth plan (especially when you end up with an unplanned natural breech birth).   Lisa Chin learned first hand the benefits of having a...

Dealing With a Picky Eater: Does Your Child Refuse to Eat Anything?

Dealing With a Picky Eater: Does Your Child Refuse to Eat Anything?

guest post by Melody Manwell. It's not just you mama. I know it feels like maybe you're failing when your kid eats about 3 items, none are healthy, and dealing with a picky eater is so hard! That's why Melody Manwell is here to shed some light on why your kid might be...

Easy Meals for New Moms

Easy Meals for New Moms

Meal planning can overwhelm anyone. Add a newborn into the mix and it can be downright impossible! But if you’re due any day now or just had a bundle of joy, read on for tips and tricks to survive the first three months with a newborn. These easy meals for new moms...

MomUp Episode 6 with Sammi Blaque

MomUp Episode 6 with Sammi Blaque

Being present, getting grounded, centered, self-love, self-care... this doesn't have to mean hours and hours of time we set aside away from our kids. We can do it in the moment and reconnect with who we are as moms through our body and through sensuality. Sammi...

3 Keys to a Strong Marriage After Having a Baby

3 Keys to a Strong Marriage After Having a Baby

by contributor: April Vaassen Just surviving can be tough, let alone thriving and making sure your marriage is staying strong after having a baby. But, mama, it IS possible. These three keys have helped me maintain a strong marriage after having a baby.   I often...

MomUp Show Episode 5 with Christina Johnson

MomUp Show Episode 5 with Christina Johnson

As a mom, sometimes it's hard to just accomplish taking a shower. But we have to much potential we can tap into. So many goals we can achieve, and dreams to reach.  In this episode of the MomUp Show, I chat with Christina Johnson all about living your purpose and how...

MomUp Show Episode 4 with Ashley Hagan

MomUp Show Episode 4 with Ashley Hagan

Hey Mamas. Morgan here. You know, I rarely actually introduce MYSELF on episodes. But I'm the founder of momuprising.com and this podcast. I love hanging out with you every week, and I am so excited to present this episode. Ashley Hagan is a yoga instructor and brand...

MomUp Show Episode 3 with Aleia McDaniel

MomUp Show Episode 3 with Aleia McDaniel

Self-care for moms is about more than bubble baths and brunches. It runs much deeper, and is a learned skill. One essential component is creating boundaries around self-care for moms.  Aleia McDaniel shares how she was able to create fierce boundaries for her...

Episode 2 with Sunshine Boatright

Episode 2 with Sunshine Boatright

Moms. Give yourself some grace. We put the weight of the world on our shoulders, and our ambition is high octane sometimes, but we also need to show ourselves a minimum level of self-love and self-care.  Sunshine Boatright joins us on the second episode of the...

I’m a Mom, and I Don’t Do Dishes.

I’m a Mom, and I Don’t Do Dishes.

I. Don't. Do. Dishes. This isn't an exaggeration either. Even though I'm a mom, and my primary job is caring for my children, I have done the dishes less than a handful of times in the last year.    Yeah that might seem impossible... but it's true. I don't do...

The Best Nursing Bras According to Breastfeeding Moms

The Best Nursing Bras According to Breastfeeding Moms

If there is one thing that changes after having a baby... it's your breasts. Chances are you don't quite recognize them anymore. Breastfeeding initially means your breasts are a lot bigger than they used to be and probably leaking milk on a regular basis. Once your...

What Self-Care Really Means for Moms? Being Your OWN Mom.

What Self-Care Really Means for Moms? Being Your OWN Mom.

Self-care as a mom is almost a joke at this point. It seems like some luxury we will never be rich enough to afford either with enough money or time. We feel like we are always running on a deficit of either income or sleep. But self-care isn't about the mani/pedi's...

Episode 1 with Dana Skoglund

Episode 1 with Dana Skoglund

  If you struggle to create new habits, achieve your goals, and stick to and implement plans, then this one is for you. Dana Skoglund, yoga instructor and productivity expert, walks us through a little coaching session on how to achieve your goals as a mom by...

3 Reasons It’s Harder for Moms to Keep Resolutions

3 Reasons It’s Harder for Moms to Keep Resolutions

Every year I do it. I try to defy the odds and finally complete just one resolution. But as the years have gone by, it isn't getting any easier. In fact, it feels harder! Becoming a mom has not lowered the bar, and it's clear that there are more than a few reasons...

Welcome to the MomUp Show

Welcome to the MomUp Show

Hey Mama, Nice to meet you. I'm Morgan, the founder of Mom Uprising. I'm here to help you reconnect, to find yourself again, even in the midst of the chaos of motherhood. As I type this, my 4 year old is sitting on my lap because she "wanted up." I know it's easy to...

Why I Ignored “Experts” to Embrace My Mama Bear Instincts

Why I Ignored “Experts” to Embrace My Mama Bear Instincts

The mama bear instincts. They are strong. They are fierce. The truth is that we have all the wisdom we need inside of us as mothers. Do we value the input of others when asked? Of course. But the instincts we were given naturally are the most important compass that we...

Being Present Vs. Giving Presents this Holiday Season

Being Present Vs. Giving Presents this Holiday Season

Delete. Delete. Delete... I hit that button about a dozen times until my Amazon cart was empty. I had gone on a bit of an adding to cart binge while looking for stocking stuffers for my kids. What I had intended to be a minimalist Christmas filled with experiences...

Why You Need a Postpartum Doula

Why You Need a Postpartum Doula

by guest blogger: Felicia Trumbauer Postpartum can be a wonderful blissful time of settling into your new family, or it can be a whirlwind of stress. With all the expenses associated with a new baby, sometimes it's easy to ignore why you need a postpartum doula....

What if You Don’t Have a College Fund for Your Kid?

What if You Don’t Have a College Fund for Your Kid?

Raise your hand if you haven't saved a dime toward your child's education. Feeling some guilt about that? The experts say don't! The idea of being able start saving for college may seem like a pipe dream. Yes, if you have some extra cash you can put away for your...

How I Feel About My Postpartum Body Now

How I Feel About My Postpartum Body Now

This body... It has done amazing things. Birthed three children and nursed them for over 3.5 years combined. In one breath I thank every stretch mark. In the next I curse them. While I know this body gave me my babies, part of me can only see the imperfections as...

5 Productivity Tips for Stay at Home Mom Entrepreneurs

5 Productivity Tips for Stay at Home Mom Entrepreneurs

It's no surprise that the number one issue for a stay at home mom entrepreneur is time and productivity. The average mom only gets 17 minutes of alone time per day. That's barely enough time to take a shower let alone build a business. Let's see if we can find a...

The Best Tips to Succeed at Breastfeeding from Real Moms

The Best Tips to Succeed at Breastfeeding from Real Moms

Breastfeeding is hard. Yes it's natural, but it doesn't always come naturally to many of us. Bad latch, low supply, going back to work, pressure to supplement from doctors... the list of possible issues that can arise is long and can be complicated. A few...

I’m Not Ready to Be a Soccer Mom. Where Did My Baby Go?

I’m Not Ready to Be a Soccer Mom. Where Did My Baby Go?

Is this what a soccer mom looks like? In some ways I guess I lucked out to be a mom and a "soccer mom" in this era. We are blessed with things like SUV's and high waisted jeans actually being in style, a nice little perk for our distended postpartum bellies. And while...

This Real Mom Says Attachment Parenting is for Lazy Parents

This Real Mom Says Attachment Parenting is for Lazy Parents

written by Sarah of RealSimpleMama.com We attachment parents like to think of ourselves as martyrs. The benefits of attachment parenting are undeniable, but sometimes we lose that focus by dramatizing in an attempt to look selfless and noble. The media doesn't help...

Owning My Story of Postpartum Depression

Owning My Story of Postpartum Depression

The greatest resource we have to help us in our journey through motherhood is the knowledge other mothers share with us. But nowadays it seems scarier than ever to open and share with others because we are afraid of being judged.   This can be even harder if...

Moms: Have You Forgotten Who You Were?

Moms: Have You Forgotten Who You Were?

By: Iman Gatti Have you forgotten... Who you were before the chaos? Before everything you did was questioned and scrutinized. Before the stakes were so high. Before all of this emerging and transforming. This tearing down and rebuilding. Before you became a mother....

5 Tips for Work Life Balance for Moms

5 Tips for Work Life Balance for Moms

As a mom, it's easy to loose sight of what balance even means anymore. So often our needs are put on the back burner for bosses or babies. But self-love and self-care expert, Eva Ponce, is sharing her best 5 tips for work life balance for moms. To be successful as...

Being “Just a Mom” and Why I Want to Be a Stay at Home Mom.

Being “Just a Mom” and Why I Want to Be a Stay at Home Mom.

Being called "just" a mom is offensive as hell. Any mother knows that this is the toughest job in the world. I've worked outside of the home, from home, and have also not worked while staying home with kids. I would always been quick to call out someone who puts down...

How Shame Stops Moms from Practicing Self-Care

How Shame Stops Moms from Practicing Self-Care

How many times have you heard that self-care is essential as a mom? That we have to fill our own cup first, or put on our own oxygen mask before helping others? But the thing is... how often do you actually practice self-care?   We chalk it up to not having the...

First Trimester Must Haves for Morning Sickness

First Trimester Must Haves for Morning Sickness

These first trimester must haves are absolutely essential for all the mamas out there struggling. This is a list of all the pregnancy essentials for first trimester morning sickness is no joke.   Getting over that (all day) morning sickness... As I type this out,...

Myths About Stay-At-Home-Mom Entrepreneurs

Myths About Stay-At-Home-Mom Entrepreneurs

As a stay-at-home-mom entrepreneur I feel like there are a few myths floating around out there about what we do. So let’s put on our hardhats and bust some myths about stay-at-home-mom entrepreneurs.

Nourishing Your Body (Simple Self-Care Part 3)

Nourishing Your Body (Simple Self-Care Part 3)

How often do we think about our body as either a baby-making factory or something that needs to snap back into pre-baby shape? We are either feeding our bodies to feed our growing babies, or trying to morph it into something it resembled before a human incubated inside of it. What if instead, you focused on nourishing your body?

 

Time to Focus on Self

This is what I thought to myself as I pushed a double stroller filled with about 50 pounds of baby around my neighborhood.

To say I wasn’t feeling my best would be an understatement.

Psoriasis, fatigue, bloating, and more. My body was just feeling out of control, and as a result, I was emotionally wrought as well.

I had no grip on what the hell was happening in my body because I had no grip on what I was feeding my body. The idea of nourishing your body wasn’t even in my lexicon.

Plus, besides taking care of the kids, I got almost literally no exercise (hence throwing myself into pushing the double stroller any and every where). While I don’t want to speak ill of myself, the truth is that I was kind of feeling like a slob. A couch potato. A hermit. An eater of all the foods.

It came on slowly. I quit smoking and fulfilled those cravings with food instead. Then winter came with all the typical holiday foods combined with being cooped up inside in the cold. It was brutal.

You know the mind and body are inextricably linked, right? What’s happening in our body impacts our thoughts, feelings, and emotions, and vice versa.

It’s so easy to get caught in these loops of unhealth and dis-ease. You eat like crap, which makes your body feel like crap, and you emotionally feel like crap because due to not being nourished properly.

Not to mention, you know you “should” be eating healthfully, and aren’t, so the guilt and shame start to creep in. Then you say screw it, and pull out another piece of that Christmas cheesecake or the kids’ leftover Halloween candy and drown your sorrows in food.

I know I’m not the only one who does this, right? Even if your story doesn’t sound *exactly* like mine, I bet you can relate to some aspect.

While I do compare our bodies to cars in the last post about self-care, we are not literally machines. We are not perfect. We have all kinds of things that come up and derail us from nourishing our bodies.

So while I did give myself a little grace, and not go too hard on my lack of attention to my body, a change was needed.

 

Making Realistic Changes

At the age of 32, I’m still fairly young, but I can tell my body is changing and the choices I make have a much greater impact on my body and mood than they once did.

I mean… two glasses of wine and I’m hungover the next day, even though I used to be able to pound shots and six-packs of beer in my early 20’s then get up and go to work the next day. (Oh how times have changed)

Completely overhauling my diet and exercise has never worked for me. I LOVE food. I mean even when I’m not emotionally eating and then hating myself for it, I just love to eat. It’s a sport, a hobby, a pastime, a love for me. I’m not particularly interested in taking certain foods off the table or completely abstaining.

The point here wasn’t to starve myself and get super skinny. I was in the middle of developing a self-LOVE practice as well as a self-care practice. That’s why I wanted to characterize this as nourishing your body vs. going on some diet and exercise routine.

Not only is this about helping your body feel good so that you feel good emotionally too and are able to be at your best for yourself and your kids, but this is also about learning to love yourself when you get a little off track, not punish yourself.

With wellbeing as the goal, I was able to approach this with a new mindset. Instead of thinking “I need to lose X amount of pounds,” I actually sat down and wrote out a list of things that make me feel good. Some of them are more spiritual and we will get that in the next post. Others were basics like getting more sleep, which I discussed here.

Two of the biggest things on that list were feeling like my clothes fit well, meaning I’m not bloating, and just a little thinner, and I also get outside and exercise every day. (Even when it is freezing out!)

First was to decide on a diet, or rather, a system of nourishing my body. (Diet sounds so… well you know…)

I thought back to the summer before.

In the summer of 2018, I was at the lightest I had been in a long long time. I realized that I had been eating in a more intuitive way. To be honest, I devoured cheeseburgers and sweet potato fries a lot of afternoons followed up by a piece of strawberry pie from a local restaurant I loved. Yet, I still felt better and was lighter.

But what I mean by more intuitive was that I didn’t eat unless I was actually hungry.

My mind clicked and I remembered seeing a bunch of people posting about intermittent fasting, which I realized was also what I was doing.

I have never been into eating breakfast every day. I just never felt that hungry in the mornings. I preferred to wait to eat until noon or soon after.

However, I had gotten into the habit of eating as soon as I got up in the morning, and eating a lot! It wasn’t because I was actually hungry. It was because I was bored and my twins had been getting me up at 4am. Eating was something to do to pass the time and make the early rising feel a little more palatable.

 

A New Way of Eating

I decided to cut that out and give intermittent fasting a try. Besides knowing that I had naturally done it for years without knowing the name for it, I also found that there was a lot of research pointing to it being excellent for your health in many ways.

There are a few different methods of intermittent fasting, but I kept it super simple. I decided to only eat between the hours of 12 pm and 8 pm. This is what I had always naturally felt was right for my body, and it was an easy rule to follow, and the best part is that during that time I ate whatever the hell I wanted!

Hello burgers, fries, pizza, meatballs, all the pasta, and more!

Most of the food I consume is homecooked and organic. So I really don’t monitor what exactly I am eating, as long as I only eat during the hours I have set up for myself. The basic point of intermittent fasting is to give your body time to clear out all the food you’ve already eaten before filling it back up again the next day.

When I do this, I feel so much better! I might feel occasionally hungry in the morning, and if I really feel famished and like my body NEEDS food ASAP, then I feed it. (Remember this is about nourishing your body, not punishing it.)

But for the most part, I stick to drinking water and coffee in the morning and then eat a good lunch around noon.

The other thing I knew I needed was not just exercise, but to get outside.

I tried to go to the gym. I really did. I got a membership to the YMCA where I take my kids for swim lessons and gymnastics. They have child watch hours where your kids can play with the other kids while all the mamas get their workouts in.

The first day was great! I was able to go to a yoga class, but ever since, my twins have come down with extreme cases of separation anxiety and literally cry the entire time they are there.

Let’s just say it isn’t very easy to relax and focus on your downward dog while you know your kids are screaming their heads off.

My only real option for exercise is something that includes my kids. So walking and hiking it is. Not to mention it gets me into nature, which is essential for my well-being.

For most humans, we are seriously in need of connection with nature. Plus, many of us are vitamin D deficient! So getting out into nature helps us connect and some sunny D. You’re nourishing your body and soul when you’re outside.

The thing is that creating a new routine of getting exercise every day, and sometimes multiple times a day is not my forté.

That’s why, when I began to focus on getting exercise, I decided to pull out a tool that worked wonders in the past, my BellaBeat Leaf.

Not only is it totally cute, but it works and comes with an app that tracks steps, exercise, sleep, meditation, water intake, and your period! It’s the perfect all in one health tracker for women.

With my trusty Leaf in hand, I set my goal to simply to walk 10,000 steps per day.

At first, that seemed like a lot, but once I started tracking daily it really wasn’t too hard to accomplish. Besides the normal walking around the house and doing errands, I just did a morning and an evening walk with the kids.

My regular loop is just about one-mile roundtrip, so I was walking about 2 miles per day in addition to my regular daily activities.

 

And the results?

This isn’t one of those shocking “I lost 50 pounds in a month” kinds of posts.

I DID lose some weight. About 5-7 pounds so far over the course of a few months. But the transformation here isn’t about the weight or how I look. The transformation here is about how I FEEL.

Physically I feel stronger. I feel capable and like my body is working for me instead of me feeling like a slave to my cravings and various small health issues.

Emotionally I just feel lighter and happier. Of course, I have been doing a lot of self-love and spiritual work, which I’ll discuss soon, but as I said above, your body and mind/soul/spirit are interconnected. So the focus I’ve put on nourishing my body and ensuring that it is well cared for has helped me make a shift emotionally as well.

In the past, when I wanted to make changes to my diet and exercise routines, it was all about the external. It was about having a flat tummy, getting rid of cellulite, etc.

At this point though, I am learning to love my body as it is and accepting it as it is.

I was very clear with myself from the beginning of this journey that any external changes in my body were not necessary. What mattered was that I was doing what I knew to be healthy for my body, and as long as I felt good, that’s what mattered.

And I do. I feel good.

Do I have days where I don’t feel confident in my body? Do I have days where I start eating as soon as I wake up and have midnight snacks? Of course! This is actually an important component. Understanding that some days I will get off track either purposefully (like a girls’ night) or because I am eating my feelings allows me to show compassion towards myself and my body, which ironically makes it easier to get back on track when I’m off.

But I also look at those days that get off track as a signpost. They are an indication that something is happening internally. There is something happening emotionally that needs tended too. So I go ahead and let myself enjoy that giant bowl of buttered noodles and glass of Pinot Grigio at 10 pm, then the next day I sit down at my desk, light a candle and write in my journal until I can clear whatever feelings are causing me to get off track.

And it isn’t as if the times I’ve gotten off course are few and far between or they are only one day. No. I’ve had entire weeks that I was far from perfect. Eating whenever, whatever, and not exercising.

But to be honest, I just embraced it. I decided that my body must need extra rest and nourishment, so may as well go with it while remaining in tune physically and emotionally so that when the time felt right, I jumped back into my routines. (I mean… menstruation happens and I’m definitely up for more rest and more chocolate during those times.)

Again, I may sound like a broken record, but the idea is that you are nourishing your body, not punishing it. So at every point, even when you’ve fallen well off the wagon, it is all about figuring out why and perhaps it is even a GOOD thing that you did.

Reassessment is important. What you decided was important for you 2 months ago or even a week ago may not be relevant anymore. So take these moments to just chill and love on yourself even more.

Self-care as a mom is essential. You are sure your children are nourishing their bodies with what you provide. Time to do the same for yourself, mama.

Self-Care Ideas for Moms (From a Dad and Teacher)

Self-Care Ideas for Moms (From a Dad and Teacher)

These self-care ideas for moms are must-know if you are one of those people who craves alone time and doesn't know what to do with it when you get it! Ironically, it's a dad who is going to share some of these essential self-care strategies with us today. Taking care...

Why Breastfeeding is Important Beyond Health

Why Breastfeeding is Important Beyond Health

We could talk about the health benefits for mom and baby which most people point to, but there are other reasons to consider why breastfeeding is important. Breastfeeding is a complicated topic in mom culture today. While we are in a sort of renaissance when it comes...

Teaching Kids to Cook, Getting Started

Teaching Kids to Cook, Getting Started

Teaching kids to cook has a ton of benefits for parents and kids. While it may seem daunting to let your little ones take on the responsibility of helping prepare meals, it is totally doable. Most parents make sure that the entire kitchen is baby-proofed and safe for...

Mom Hack: Knowing Baby Developmental Leaps

Mom Hack: Knowing Baby Developmental Leaps

Dealing with cranky kids is rough, but if you want to take those extra fussy baby days in stride then knowing baby developmental leaps is essential! We've all been there. Our sweet little squish is the most calm and cool kid ever... until they're not. You wake up one...

5 Tips for How to Give Birth Naturally Without Pain

5 Tips for How to Give Birth Naturally Without Pain

Want to know how to give birth naturally without pain? Awesome! It IS possible to greatly reduce discomfort during birth. These are the five best ways. Before we dive into specific natural childbirth techniques for relaxation and feeling more comfortable in birth,...

Clearing Clutter Where to Start

Clearing Clutter Where to Start

It's so easy to get buried in stuff when you're a parent. Kids have so many things! Combine that with yours and a partner's? The clutter can easily get out of control. That's why today we are going to talk about clearing clutter, where to start. Mia Danielle joins me...

Two Shirt Method: How to Discreetly Breastfeed in Public

Two Shirt Method: How to Discreetly Breastfeed in Public

Learning to breastfeed as a new mom can be challenging, and when it comes to breastfeeding in public, things can get awkward pretty quickly when you aren’t very experienced at it. But there is a super simple trick to low-key nursing in public, it’s called the two shirt method.

Having a Motherhood Identity Crisis?

Having a Motherhood Identity Crisis?

Becoming a mother for the first (or second, third, fourth, five...) time is life-changing and beautiful, but it can also lead to a motherhood identity crisis. People say your life is over when you have children. I tried to deny it. I tried to fight it. I tried to...

Nourishing Your Body (Simple Self-Care Part 3)

Nourishing Your Body (Simple Self-Care Part 3)

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Learning to Love Your Body as a Mom

Who else struggles with learning to love your body? I know I’m not the only one, right? As we try to change the way we view moms and postpartum bodies, so many times we are still just learning to love our bodies ourselves.

How to Stop Yelling at Your Kids with One Simple Tip

How to Stop Yelling at Your Kids with One Simple Tip

We've all been there, right? There are few people who can push our buttons like those little cherubs known as... our kids. But we also know that keeping our cool is key to being the parent we want to be. Try this one simple tip on how to stop yelling at your kids....

Being a Mother is the Best Feeling. What Could Compare?

Being a Mother is the Best Feeling. What Could Compare?

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Skin Care Products for Breastfeeding Moms

Skin Care Products for Breastfeeding Moms

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How to Be a Better Parent with Personal Development

How to Be a Better Parent with Personal Development

How many time have you agonized over losing it and yelling at your kids, or felt guilty over all the screen time they are getting lately? It's normal if you tend to wonder how you can be a better parent. This is a tough job. Karen Hewitt shares in this episode of...

Forgiving Yourself for Parenting Mistakes

Forgiving Yourself for Parenting Mistakes

We’ve all thought it at least one, right? The question: “Am I screwing up my kids?” The truth is… yes. To some extent. We all are. Because we can’t do this job perfectly and it’s time we learn that forgiving yourself for parenting mistakes is not just ok, but essential.

Weight Loss for Busy Moms: How to Start Your Healthy Journey

Weight Loss for Busy Moms: How to Start Your Healthy Journey

Moms are under so much pressure to not just be the best mother possible, but to look like society's idea of perfection while doing it. It can be really hard to both love ourselves exactly as we are while also wanting to be healthy and happy. Jai Murphy, certified...

How to Enjoy Being a Stay-at-Home Mom

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For a lot of moms (and dads), being able to stay at home with the kids and ditch the 9-5 sounds like a fantasy. But once you’re actually at home with those kids 24/7, it can get a little monotonous (and chaotic) to say the least. It can be hard to actually enjoy it. So here are our 10 best tips on how to enjoy being a stay-at-home mom.

25 Inspirational Mom Quotes

25 Inspirational Mom Quotes

25 of the best inspirational mom quotes for motivation, inspiration and commiseration. Enjoy these inspiration quotes mamas.1.The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness. -Honore de Balzac 2. One of the greatest titles...

What Do Moms Want for Mother’s Day? (This Mom Shares the Truth)

What Do Moms Want for Mother’s Day? (This Mom Shares the Truth)

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Are Royal Births Different Than Ours?

Are Royal Births Different Than Ours?

Have you seen this meme? It's a glowing Meghan Markle with Prince Harry and the newest royal baby, Archie on one side. On the other side, is a typical family at the hospital after a birth, with mom rockin' some of our fav mesh panties.   There is no doubt that...

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Why Do We Celebrate Mother’s Day? Is It Time We Stopped?

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Life Was Boring Before Kids

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Moms Who Drink: Is Drinking Out of Control for Moms?

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The Truth About How Hard it is to Be a Mom

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Re-building the Village: Creating Community for Moms

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there might be a ton of reasons we sometimes feel divided as moms, but the truth is that any division that happens within the mom community are truly due to our lack of connection. While we may be a group that shares many things in common, we don't always feel like a...

They Grow Up So Fast: Learning to Go With the Flow in Motherhood

They Grow Up So Fast: Learning to Go With the Flow in Motherhood

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Rainbow Toys for Toddlers

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Natural Breech Birth: Making Confident Choices in Childbirth

Natural Breech Birth: Making Confident Choices in Childbirth

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Dealing With a Picky Eater: Does Your Child Refuse to Eat Anything?

Dealing With a Picky Eater: Does Your Child Refuse to Eat Anything?

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Easy Meals for New Moms

Easy Meals for New Moms

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MomUp Episode 6 with Sammi Blaque

MomUp Episode 6 with Sammi Blaque

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3 Keys to a Strong Marriage After Having a Baby

3 Keys to a Strong Marriage After Having a Baby

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MomUp Show Episode 5 with Christina Johnson

MomUp Show Episode 5 with Christina Johnson

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MomUp Show Episode 4 with Ashley Hagan

MomUp Show Episode 4 with Ashley Hagan

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MomUp Show Episode 3 with Aleia McDaniel

MomUp Show Episode 3 with Aleia McDaniel

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Episode 2 with Sunshine Boatright

Episode 2 with Sunshine Boatright

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I’m a Mom, and I Don’t Do Dishes.

I’m a Mom, and I Don’t Do Dishes.

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The Best Nursing Bras According to Breastfeeding Moms

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What Self-Care Really Means for Moms? Being Your OWN Mom.

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Episode 1 with Dana Skoglund

Episode 1 with Dana Skoglund

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3 Reasons It’s Harder for Moms to Keep Resolutions

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Welcome to the MomUp Show

Welcome to the MomUp Show

Hey Mama, Nice to meet you. I'm Morgan, the founder of Mom Uprising. I'm here to help you reconnect, to find yourself again, even in the midst of the chaos of motherhood. As I type this, my 4 year old is sitting on my lap because she "wanted up." I know it's easy to...

Why I Ignored “Experts” to Embrace My Mama Bear Instincts

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Being Present Vs. Giving Presents this Holiday Season

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Why You Need a Postpartum Doula

Why You Need a Postpartum Doula

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What if You Don’t Have a College Fund for Your Kid?

What if You Don’t Have a College Fund for Your Kid?

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How I Feel About My Postpartum Body Now

How I Feel About My Postpartum Body Now

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5 Productivity Tips for Stay at Home Mom Entrepreneurs

5 Productivity Tips for Stay at Home Mom Entrepreneurs

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The Best Tips to Succeed at Breastfeeding from Real Moms

The Best Tips to Succeed at Breastfeeding from Real Moms

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I’m Not Ready to Be a Soccer Mom. Where Did My Baby Go?

I’m Not Ready to Be a Soccer Mom. Where Did My Baby Go?

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This Real Mom Says Attachment Parenting is for Lazy Parents

This Real Mom Says Attachment Parenting is for Lazy Parents

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Owning My Story of Postpartum Depression

Owning My Story of Postpartum Depression

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Moms: Have You Forgotten Who You Were?

Moms: Have You Forgotten Who You Were?

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5 Tips for Work Life Balance for Moms

5 Tips for Work Life Balance for Moms

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Being “Just a Mom” and Why I Want to Be a Stay at Home Mom.

Being “Just a Mom” and Why I Want to Be a Stay at Home Mom.

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How Shame Stops Moms from Practicing Self-Care

How Shame Stops Moms from Practicing Self-Care

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First Trimester Must Haves for Morning Sickness

First Trimester Must Haves for Morning Sickness

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Myths About Stay-At-Home-Mom Entrepreneurs

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Child Personality Types: Must-Learn System to Be a Better Parent

Child Personality Types: Must-Learn System to Be a Better Parent

Wish there was a manual for this whole parenting thing? Well there just might be. Learning about child personality types can help you hack your way through parenting and be a better mom.

Today’s guest on the MomUp Show, Sabrina Ivonne, loves helping parents learn more about child personality types and how they can help parents better understand their children.

Energy profiling is one of the first things Sabrina asks all moms about. It’s a system by Carol Tuttle based on Ayurvedic medicine. Here’s a quick rundown of the system, so you can deal with those childhood moods a little better.

There are four energy types simple numbered 1-4. While we all have all four energies within us, we are primarily one of the four energies. Sabrina helps parents figure out their children’s type so they can better understand and parent their children. Sabrina recommends learning your own type first and then your children’s.

A brief description of each type:

Type 1:

The social butterfly who can talk to anyone. Bubbly, fun, exuberant, and flutters from place to place rapidly.

Type 2:

Emotional, soft, and sensitive this person is a much more slow-moving and comfort-seeking person.

Type 3:

Determined, go-getter, and natural-born leaders this type won’t stop until they reach the top.

Type 4:

Bold, striking, perfectionist, and lovers of balance. They are constantly editing and perfecting everything as they are very meticulous.

Listen in while we try to type me and my kids! Plus, lots of chat about parenting for YOUR child, astrology, and energy.

Sabrina Ivonne is a Board Certified Behavior Analyst, Holistic Behavior Specialist, triple fire sign, serial entrepreneur, M.O.M, and the creator of the Wildly Grounded in Self-Love Retreat.

She guides, coaches, and supports mothers of children with big responses to life’s “normal” stuff including children diagnosed with ASD and ADHD. She teaches them to affect change in your child’s behavior through loving, compassionate means. She also guides the entire family to work together for everyone’s mutual benefit. She often works with mothers who feel lost and overwhelmed by the enormity of their child’s needs and who’ve lost themselves in the process of raising their children.

Having worked with families for 26 years, she’s witnessed countless mothers abandon themselves, their emotional needs, and their spiritual healing. So she created the Wildly Grounded in Self-Love Retreat happening October 16-21 on the Big Island of Hawai’i— a five-night, six-day luxe feeling + healing experience; a chance to say “yes” to yourself and your true desires in all areas of your life.

Learn more at www.venusinbusiness.com

Self-Care Ideas for Moms (From a Dad and Teacher)

Self-Care Ideas for Moms (From a Dad and Teacher)

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Why Breastfeeding is Important Beyond Health

Why Breastfeeding is Important Beyond Health

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Teaching Kids to Cook, Getting Started

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Mom Hack: Knowing Baby Developmental Leaps

Mom Hack: Knowing Baby Developmental Leaps

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5 Tips for How to Give Birth Naturally Without Pain

5 Tips for How to Give Birth Naturally Without Pain

Want to know how to give birth naturally without pain? Awesome! It IS possible to greatly reduce discomfort during birth. These are the five best ways. Before we dive into specific natural childbirth techniques for relaxation and feeling more comfortable in birth,...

Clearing Clutter Where to Start

Clearing Clutter Where to Start

It's so easy to get buried in stuff when you're a parent. Kids have so many things! Combine that with yours and a partner's? The clutter can easily get out of control. That's why today we are going to talk about clearing clutter, where to start. Mia Danielle joins me...

Two Shirt Method: How to Discreetly Breastfeed in Public

Two Shirt Method: How to Discreetly Breastfeed in Public

Learning to breastfeed as a new mom can be challenging, and when it comes to breastfeeding in public, things can get awkward pretty quickly when you aren’t very experienced at it. But there is a super simple trick to low-key nursing in public, it’s called the two shirt method.

Having a Motherhood Identity Crisis?

Having a Motherhood Identity Crisis?

Becoming a mother for the first (or second, third, fourth, five...) time is life-changing and beautiful, but it can also lead to a motherhood identity crisis. People say your life is over when you have children. I tried to deny it. I tried to fight it. I tried to...

Nourishing Your Body (Simple Self-Care Part 3)

Nourishing Your Body (Simple Self-Care Part 3)

How often do we think about our body as either a baby-making factory or something that needs to snap back into pre-baby shape? We are either feeding our bodies to feed our growing babies, or trying to morph it into something it resembled before a human incubated...