There are some little secrets and momlife truths that we don’t really understand or even realize until we’ve been a mom for quite a while. The first year or two is a whirlwind, and while it doesn’t get easier as they get older, the beginning phases of being a mom generally just include holding on for survival. 

But even as our children get older, we don’t really snap back into our old selves. A momlife truth is that we are different, and our lives are different.

Like this momlife truth: Motherhood stops me from doing what I used to love. But that’s ok.

It’s not that I literally can’t. Sure there is a way I could figure it out, make it work. It’s just I don’t really want to anymore.

I’m not interested. Too tired. Outgrown it. The reasons are numerous, but the bottom line is I just can’t do what I used to. And while I’m a little bummed, I can’t say I’m really sad about it.

The truth is, those things wouldn’t really make me happy anymore.

Think about it… What makes you happy now? Do you even know? (besides your kids/family)

It’s not just a matter of remembering. It isn’t just that you’re so tired you can’t quite get a grip on who you used to be and what you used to enjoy, it’s that the person you once were doesn’t exist anymore.

Part of her is still there. She still lingers on the outskirts of your soul.

But now a new woman is inside of you.

You’ve been changed by motherhood.

So even the basic things you enjoy now aren’t the same, or have shifted even if in subtle ways.

I used to love to travel. And for the last four years since I became a mother I have held onto the idea of traveling as hard as I could. I mean, you could try to pull my passport out of my cold dead fingers.

But the reality? It’s not just that travel is nearly impossible right now with a 4 year old and twin 1 year olds, it’s also that I just have lost some of the desire.

The idea of packing up a family of five and traveling anywhere beyond the 2.5 hour trek to my moms, sounds terrible!

And travel isn’t the only thing.

Going out to bars? Wine tasting? Shopping? Knitting? Leisurely strolls through farmers markets followed up by day full of luxuriously cooking rich dishes from expensive ingredients? Even going to the gym?

Nope. None of that is happening.

But it’s taken me the entirety of motherhood thus far to come to grips with the fact that I either can’t or don’t want to do the things I used to love.

But I’ve finally accepted it.

Now that I accepted it? I love it.

I finally realized this… what kind of person would I be if I still had all of the exact same interests I did before I was a mom?

What kind of person would I be if I never tried anything new, or learned anything new?

At the least I would be pretty boring, and the most I’d be really unhappy.

Motherhood forces you out of any and all comfort zones. It’s a crucible. A gauntlet.

Sink or swim. Though really there is only the choice to swim.

Time is precious.

When just having a shower without an extra little body bobbling around in there with you seems like a luxury, you have be super intentional about how you spend that free time.

It’s not just a matter of remembering. It isn’t just that you’re so tired you can’t quite get a grip on who you used to be and what you used to enjoy, it’s that the person you once were doesn’t exist anymore.

Part of her is still there. She still lingers on the outskirts of your soul.

But now a new woman is inside of you.

You’ve been changed by motherhood. Momlife is not the same as single life.

So even the basic things you enjoy now aren’t the same, or have shifted even if in subtle ways.

I used to love to travel. And for the last four years since I became a mother I have held onto the idea of traveling as hard as I could. I mean, you could try to pull my passport out of my cold dead fingers.

But the reality? It’s not just that travel is nearly impossible right now with a 4 year old and twin 1 year olds, it’s also that I just have lost some of the desire.

The idea of packing up a family of five and traveling anywhere beyond the 2.5 hour trek to my moms, sounds terrible!

And travel isn’t the only thing.

Going out to bars? Wine tasting? Shopping? Knitting? Leisurely strolls through farmers markets followed up by day full of luxuriously cooking rich dishes from expensive ingredients? Even going to the gym?

Nope. None of that is happening.

But it’s taken me the entirety of motherhood thus far to come to grips with the fact that I either can’t or don’t want to do the things I used to love.

But I’ve finally accepted it.

Now that I accepted it? I love it.

I finally realized this… what kind of person would I be if I still had all of the exact same interests I did before I was a mom?

What kind of person would I be if I never tried anything new, or learned anything new?

At the least I would be pretty boring, and the most I’d be really unhappy.

Motherhood forces you out of any and all comfort zones. It’s a crucible. A gauntlet.

Sink or swim. Though really there is only the choice to swim.

Time is precious.

When just having a shower without an extra little body bobbling around in there with you seems like a luxury, you have be super intentional about how you spend that free time.

Now that I accepted it? I love it.

I finally realized this… what kind of person would I be if I still had all of the exact same interests I did before I was a mom?

What kind of person would I be if I never tried anything new, or learned anything new?

At the least I would be pretty boring, and the most I’d be really unhappy.

Motherhood forces you out of any and all comfort zones. It’s a crucible. A gauntlet.

Sink or swim. Though really there is only the choice to swim.

Time is precious.

When just having a shower without an extra little body bobbling around in there with you seems like a luxury, you have be super intentional about how you spend that free time.

So I am mindful AF about what I do with my time both while I’m with my kids and alone. 

 

I don’t try to live up to some expectations of what I thought momlife should be life, because now I know the truth of momlife

It’s hard, but it’s incredible. 

All the things I used to love (or at least a lot of them), just aren’t part of my world anymore. Maybe they will be again some day, but right now? Nope. 

And I’m happy with that. Being a mom and living this momlife truth is worth it. 

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