by guest blogger: Felicia Trumbauer
Postpartum can be a wonderful blissful time of settling into your new family, or it can be a whirlwind of stress. With all the expenses associated with a new baby, sometimes it’s easy to ignore why you need a postpartum doula.
However, one of the best ways you can get support and ease during this transition is by hiring a postpartum doula. (After hiring our own, we swear by them!)
Felicia Trumbauer is a doula-in-training and mother of two.
She shares her top five reasons why you need a postpartum doula.
1. She’ll listen.
A woman embarking on motherhood may want to talk to someone about multiple parts of this life changing time but sometimes she doesn’t have the type of listener she needs.
Many women have people in their lives that give well meaning, and not so well meaning, advice when the mother is really looking for someone to just hear her. Some people can be judgmental and make the new mom feel as though she isn’t good enough.
A postpartum doula will never do that. She will give the new mother space to speak her thoughts into existence and work through her feelings, allowing the new mother to come to her own conclusions. If mom needs to cry she’ll have a tissue, if mom needs to retell her birth experience for the tenth time she’ll listen fully.
There are many physical parts of postpartum that a doula can help with but having someone that will listen too is one of the biggest emotional advantages that comes with hiring a postpartum doula.
2. She’ll help manage the little things.
Who is going to walk the dog? Who is going to take the older sibling to school? Who is going to water the garden? When a woman is about to have a baby she tries her best to plan for every scenario but there’s always something that gets forgotten.
A postpartum doula will sit down and help the mother and non-birthing partner plan for all the smaller day to day tasks that may be missed. She can help create a schedule, remind certain people of their obligations, and help the new mother feel more at ease because there will be less to worry about.
3. She’ll make sure mom takes a shower.
I don’t know about you but when I had my daughter, showering became a luxury. Personal hygiene should never be something that goes on the back burner. Unfortunately when there’s a new baby in the mix and life keeps moving as if nothing major has happened, some new moms are lucky to shower every day.
A postpartum doula will be there to watch over the baby so mom is able to shower, eat, or sleep if she needs to. These daily tasks help the mother feel more like a normal human being again which helps her relax and focus on what really needs attention.
4. She’ll have resources for any service the family might need.
A postpartum doula is a generalist and is not a medical provider. She has knowledge about a lot of subjects but isn’t quite an expert in every one. If the new mother is experiencing pain during breastfeeding the postpartum doula will give referrals to trusted lactation consultants in the area. She knows when and where the Mom’s Club meets and where the closest car seat technician is.
If there is grief or trauma surrounding the transition into parenthood the postpartum doula has referrals to support groups and therapists to help get through a trying time.
5. She’ll make sure everyone can focus on bonding with the baby.
There are many people that come to visit when there’s a freshly born human around. Most of them say they’ll help around the house or bring a meal, but more often than not these people come to hold the baby while the mother is left cleaning or feeling like she needs to entertain guests.
A postpartum doula will actually do the things that Aunt Mary said she’d do. The postpartum doula will load the dish washer, make sure the diaper changing area is stocked, and fold the laundry. She is there to make sure each member of the family is able to get to know the baby and take in the few short weeks of the newborn period. If the non birthing partner is worried about bonding the postpartum doula will have ideas that will be special to this person and the baby.
If there’s an older sibling the postpartum doula will make sure the child doesn’t feel ignored and will help that child create a bond with the baby. The postpartum doula helps facilitate a loving environment with as little stress as possible.
Once you’re a mom, your number one priority is bonding and spending time with that little squish. But you really need to take care of yourself both physically and emotionally. A postpartum doula will make sure that your wellbeing doesn’t fall through the cracks as you make this transition.
Felicia is a mother to one fierce little toddler. After having her daughter she realized how little American culture cares about the new mother. Felicia is currently working towards postpartum doula certification through CAPPA. With a background rooted in activism and social work she’s looking forward to continue helping vulnerable populations become empowered. You can find out more about her on her photography page at www.littlewarriorphotography.com.